I'm Gonna Love This Job

Those kids are soooo cute! I had one of them glued to me right away and she is the cutest little thing ever. This is going to be an awesome job. The hour I was there, flew by! Plus, it will hopefully be a little bit of a distraction and I'll get pregnant. The big joke around there is if you wanna get pg just drink the water lol. Oh, I will! Another good thing is, I will have the money to buy a fertility monitor and stock up on pg tests so I can test at my little heart's desire. I think this will be good. Oh yeah, that and I get to buy a whole new wardrobe. Woot Woot! I'm a workin woman now!

Oh My Dogs Are Gonna Hate Me *UPDATED*

I got the job! I am going to be working with the infants too! I'm so excited! I go in today at 2:00 to spend an hour with them. I can't wait! Hey, if I can't get my own kid right now at least I can watch other people's babies. And get paid for it on top of it. Sweet deal if you ask me.

Update: My hours are 9am-6pm Monday-Friday. I start Thursday!

One. Just One.

That's all just one ovulatory cycle out of 15. This is absurd. Actually I don't even think there is a word for what this is. I've had one real chance in almost a year and a half. No wonder I'm not pregnant. I don't even know if AF will come on its own. Which means more Provera which means more waiting. Why can't I just be ovulatory. It's not like I don't grow follicles. I just apparently don't grow them big enough which means my body won't release them cuz they are no good. Or maybe my body is just incapable of releasing them. I just wish I'd ovulate on my own. No meds. But no. Oh well, guess we just have to wait and see what happens. Maybe I'll get AF, maybe I'll just ovulate late. Maybe I'll just quit altogether. All I know is if I'm gonna keep trying my doc needs to work faster cuz if my husband ends up going to Iraq, I don't have time to mess around. At least if he does go, we'll have enough money for one IVF cycle if need be, if that's any consolation for him being gone for a year.

Feel The Burn

So Jenna, Alex, and I went to the gym today. It was a lot of fun but there was so much I couldnt do because of my back and my shoulder. Half the ab excercises I couldnt do cuz my back wouldn't allow me to. But I did what I could and I'm pretty pleased with it all. We're going back tomorrow and every weekend after that. I plan to lose at the very least 2lbs a week which, by August, I'll only have 8 more pounds to go til I hit my weight of 95 again. I can't wait!

Not Feelin It

I'm just not excited this cycle. I'm gonna be testing on the 2nd and that's only if I don't get AF. Maybe I'll hold out til the 3rd. I don't know why there's the lack of excitement. Maybe it's because we've been trying so long, maybe because Dr. Dip Dong (as she has been dubbed) said I'm not responding to the Clomid and wasn't going to ovulate. Maybe cuz my chart looks like shit. I don't know. I'm just not dying to wake up every morning to see if my temp rose and this is honestly the first cycle where I could truly care less if I tested or not. Maybe it's because I took the relaxed approach this time around. Who knows. All I know is I'm getting sick of trying. I hate the Clomid, I hate having to watch what I eat or drink, I hate scheduling when I pee so I can take OPKs, and I'm absolutely sick of not being pregnant!

Mini Update

Oh yeah, did I mention that BOTH my ovaries are polycystic now? Yeah, found that out at my second follicle scan. Fun, huh?

And My Doctor Said I Wouldn't Ovulate

This is what I got yesterday. Looks pretty positive to me.